I started actually listening to the podcast about this story - but podcast have 6 long episodes and even though I was intrigued, I got stuck on the second episode and thought, perhaps watching a full documentary all at once might be better idea. There is literary no difference between the two, except that podcast is a bit longer and more elaborate - the timeframe of a 82 minutes documentary suited me just fine.
So far, I have never heard of "catsfishing" - which probably means scamming somebody online - I have been lucky in that sense, since we live in a interesting new times where people still learn how to behave in a virtual world and have to decide for themselves whom can they trust. Yes, I did lost some money by ordering products online that were never delivered (or if they did, they wee nothing as on the pictures) but this was not a trauma, more a lesson how to behave in the future. What happened in "Sweet Bobby" was far more malicious and devious.
The main character here is cheerful, 30-something radio presenter Kirat Assi who just ended her long term relationship and is now floating around aimlessly, feeling that her family and acquaintances expect from her to start her own family - she constantly talk about this while her voice gets more and more panicky, to the point that we are painfully aware of social expectations in Punjabi society. One day, out of the blue, she gets contacted by a handsome cardiologist from a very good and well known family who shares some friends with her - apparently everybody in Punjabi world is somehow connected - and she accepts his friendship on Facebook - with time they share close online friendship that eventually grows into a full-blown love affair, even though they never met in a real life. In fact, they did met once briefly in a nightclub, but Bobby was a bit reserved, which Kirat explained to noisy surroundings. Their online chats developed in a discussions about raising the family together, selecting babies name's, wedding dates, etc, etc - it went on for years and each time they were supposed to finally meet, Bobby would come up with another fantastic story. Most of us would give up on this imaginary "fiancé" long ago, but Kirat is all about validation from her Punjabi world and it looks as she would feel truly satisfied, fulfilled and happy only once she wears a bride dress and gets some children like all her acquaintances - she constantly talks about biological clock ticking and how she is afraid that she might miss her chance - her best chance is now this handsome stranger online (who accidentally, has a wealthy background, nice house, good job and looks like a good catch) . Of course it all eventually gets untangled towards the end and I won't spoilt the ending here - I just have to say that during the documentary, it was nobody else but Kirat herself who appeared a bit deranged, because of her intensity, gullibility and obsession with the wedding - we see photos of her as a little girl already "dressing up" as a bride, so it all gets a bit heavy, this nagging feeling of what women are expected to do to confirm their place in the society. There is a wound and emptiness here that I don't think bride's dress could ever solve.
On the other hand, its interesting to note that "catsfishing" itself at this point is still not officially a crime. So police actually did not react when Kirat came to them with her story. Even though her life had been destroyed by malicious intent, there is still no law against it - this is where getting this story out in the public might help.
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