"Sweet Bobby: My Catfish Nightmare" by Lyttanya Shannon (2024)

 

I started actually listening to the podcast about this story - but podcast have 6 long episodes and even though I was intrigued, I got stuck on the second episode and thought, perhaps watching a full documentary all at once might be better idea. There is literary no difference between the two, except that podcast is a bit longer and more elaborate - the timeframe of a 82 minutes documentary suited me just fine.

So far, I have never heard of "catsfishing" - which probably means scamming somebody online - I have been lucky in that sense, since we live in a interesting new times where people still learn how to behave in a virtual world and have to decide for themselves whom can they trust. Yes, I did lost some money by ordering products online that were never delivered (or if they did, they wee nothing as on the pictures) but this was not a trauma, more a lesson how to behave in the future. What happened in "Sweet Bobby" was far more malicious and devious. 

The main character here is cheerful, 30-something radio presenter Kirat Assi who just ended her long term relationship and is now floating around aimlessly, feeling that her family and acquaintances expect from her to start her own family - she constantly talk about this while her voice gets more and more panicky, to the point that we are painfully aware of social expectations in Punjabi society. One day, out of the blue, she gets contacted by a handsome cardiologist from a very good and well known family who shares some friends with her - apparently everybody in Punjabi world is somehow connected - and she accepts his friendship on Facebook - with time they share close online friendship that eventually grows into a full-blown love affair, even though they never met in a real life. In fact, they did met once briefly in a nightclub, but Bobby was a bit reserved, which Kirat explained to noisy surroundings. Their online chats developed in a discussions about raising the family together, selecting babies name's, wedding dates, etc, etc - it went on for years and each time they were supposed to finally meet, Bobby would come up with another fantastic story. Most of us would give up on this imaginary "fiancé" long ago, but Kirat is all about validation from her Punjabi world and it looks as she would feel truly satisfied, fulfilled and happy only once she wears a bride dress and gets some children like all her acquaintances - she constantly talks about biological clock ticking and how she is afraid that she might miss her chance - her best chance is now this handsome stranger online (who accidentally, has a wealthy background, nice house, good job and looks like a good catch) . Of course it all eventually gets untangled towards the end and I won't spoilt the ending here - I just have to say that during the documentary, it was nobody else but Kirat herself who appeared a bit deranged, because of her intensity, gullibility and obsession with the wedding - we see photos of her as a little girl already "dressing up" as a bride, so it all gets a bit heavy, this nagging feeling of what women are expected to do to confirm their place in the society. There is a wound and emptiness here that I don't think bride's dress could ever solve. 

On the other hand, its interesting to note that "catsfishing" itself at this point is still not officially a crime. So police actually did not react when Kirat came to them with her story. Even though her life had been destroyed by malicious intent, there is still no law against it - this is where getting this story out in the public might help. 

"Wicked: Part I" by Jon M. Chu (2024)

Back in 1995 I read excellent novel "Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West" by Gregory Maguire - it was the best seller that made his name and he even continued with similar type of turnings famous fairy tales upside down ("Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister", "Mirror, Mirror") though nothing ever matched the impact of the first book, which posed a very interesting question: what is the difference between good and the evil - as the "Wicked" suggested, it is really just a point of view. So here we have a character firstly dreamed by L. Frank Baum in his now classic children novel, than again re-framed as the man character of 1995 best seller, than staged for a 2003 Broadway musical and now we have Hollywood movie version that apparently breaks the records of popularity (the day I went to cinema, it was bursting with audience clearly enjoying themselves).

First, let's get on with the elephant in the room - the book upon which the musical and the movie were based in a relatively simple, 500+ pages long novel. Nothing in it suggest that it must be a two-part saga with each part being more than two hours long. The only explanation behind this is a corporate greed and desire to sell more tickets, more merchandise, etc. Why on earth are we accepting this ridiculous length of the movies is another question - in the past, it was possible to watch a perfectly satisfactory movie that would go for an hour and half. Friend suggested that moviegoers should get free blanket and a pillow, but since I always snore first half an hour, this would be disastrous for me - I would snooze as soon as the movie starts. (I caught myself snoring during "Wicked" only once - with my eyes open!) So yes, dear reader, the movie was designed as a two part extravaganza and the second part is scheduled to be released Christmas time next year. With, no doubt, accompanying T-shirts, sunglasses, lip balms and the whole shebang.

It has been long time since I read the novel so to be honest, I remember only the impression - the story was centred around unlucky and green skinned Elphaba and her popular, fashion aware and blonde roommate Glinda & how Elphaba opposes The Wizard of Oz who eventually proclaims that she is a dangerous enemy. The movie obviously had a whole team of people tailoring the script so everything is bigger, louder and more exuberant than I remember - this is not necessarily bad thing because it works perfectly for a musical. The first thing that struck me was how similar to Harry Potter it is - I would even dare to say that Harry Potter, Mean Girls and Glee paved the way for the success of this movie, as it basically combines elements of all three movies - magic school, wizards, spoiled brats, student fraternities, outsiders, etc. Everything looks amazing, there is a lot of dancing, singing, flying and all sorts of tricks not possible to do on the stage - so yes, it is a perfect musical for the modern age. With this, I also mean to describe a impeccable cellophane and not much music beneath it - I know this is a musical but I could not remember one single song from it, as they all blend into some strange combination of sameness. I could see that people are singing and was aware there is a music in the movie, but nothing caught on. Not a single song. 

Cynthia Erivo is cast in the main role and she is good - I have already noticed her in "Widows" and "Harriet" (and as a Blue Fairy in "Pinocchio") - she can do things but to be honest, her main task here is to display various shades of sadness and misery - she is green skinned outsider and as such sulks in the background, yearning to belong somewhere - anywhere. Having only Elphaba in the movie would be a bit too morose so fortunately the script adds someone completely different and this is pop starlet Ariana Grande who is actually genuinely brilliant as goody two shoes Glenda - she kicks the heels, waves her hair and is so entertaining and funny in her knowing, exaggerated bimbo-ism that her pinkness and cheerfulness is perfect contrast Elphaba's teenage angst. I suspected deep inside that movie's success also has to do with basic simplicity of the story - two teenage girls sharing the room in a magic school and Glenda helping Elphaba to became popular by giving her make-over and teaching her how to use make up. What is actually much more interesting but its not discussed at all is how Elphaba is ostracised for her steadfast opinions while Glenda stays silent in her conformist role and ends up being proclaimed "Good Witch" - I am genuinely curious will anybody else notice this, because it is clear that Elphaba suffers her fate only because she is standing outside and dares to oppose the authorities. Glenda is good only because she does not stand up to anything, all she wants is her own comfort and safety. 

2004 in retrospect

Goodreads just informed me that so far I have finished 25 out of self-imposed 24 books this year. This inspired me to sit down and have a quick look at the 2024 & how was it for me.

Books:

As mentioned, I am slowly returning to reading. There was a time - before internet, I guess - when I used to read 4 books per month, but since internet came, I am too distracted with it. So I am still reading but this time is mostly articles, news and blogs. I had stopped beating myself over not achieving same reading numbers like before and accepted that perhaps one or two books per month is more realistic. Here perhaps lies the truth of the happy life - accept the reality and make the best of it - so since I am not pushing myself to feel guilty, its going nicely. I did managed to read 12 books in both 2022 and 2023, so this time I lifted the bar slightly and read two books per month, which worked out fine and was realistic. I read some SF, biographies, a few classics, even some hard cover graphic books that earlier in my time we would call comics. 

Music:

Spotify has completely changed the way I listen to the music now, because gone are the days of walking to a physical shop and buying albums - everything is available online now so its just a matter of discovering something new that I have not heard yet. Contemplating various playlists became a part of my morning routine and I always carefully prepare what I will listen that particular day at work. I am always conscious of what I don't know so occasionally I add something classical just to check it out and this is how Bach came on the top of my 2024 list as the most played name - his body of work is huge so obviously I was busy with that. Not sure where Elvis Presley comes in here, particularly because I actually genuinely love only one of his albums ("From Elvis In Memphis", 1969) but perhaps I was listening his many various soundtracks so it has accumulated. Streisand had memoirs published this year so I was obviously listening her along the way and Ella Fitzgerald is an old favourite so no surprises here. I guess this can all change if next year I decide to research the music of for example, Brahms or Beethoven - than they might be on my personal top - otherwise I always return to my old favourites, but I always find new ones, like country blues album "Yellow Peril" by Nat Myers.

Movies:

Because I listed what impressed me here on this blog, its easy to see what I was enjoying in 2024. "Society of the Snow (La sociedad de la nieve)", ""Georgetown", ""The Zone of Interest" , "Wicked Little Letters", and "Pearl" were just some of the movies I have seen in the cinema (the last one was recently seen "Megapolis"). I have also exploring streaming platforms and particularly enjoyed "Baby Raindeer" and recently fell totally head over hills for SF series "Silo" but have also enjoyed Dutch historical documentaries about their Golden Age, Industrialisation Age, etc. A few cinema visits turned out less exciting than what people recommended me - I didn't care for either "Oppenheimer" or "Barbie" and genuinely disliked both "Poor Things" and hyped Demi Moore horror "The Substance". As for the next year, I am still not sure do i want to continue having cinema prescription since I go to cinema less and less - everything eventually comes to TV sooner or later. But there are always big movies that deserve to be seen on a big screen, I might continue.

Theatre:

Some improvement here: been to the theatre twice this year. The first play was a very bad production made out of Agatha Christie's "Murder on the Orient Express"  and that was a big disappointment that made me even question do I enjoy theatre at all. Luckily, it was all healed soon afterwards, when I saw an exciting and vibrant production of "House of Troy" by Euripides. These two were so drastically opposite of each other that I got a lesson - to be more careful what I am planning to see live on the stage. 

Travels:

I have been travelling for work and during roughly 15 years I have sailed the 7 seas and seen most of the planet. That is why I don't feel any excitement about packing again and going somewhere - I am perfectly fine here in Amsterdam, love the city and enjoying being here. Contrary to so many people wishing to be elsewhere, I am happy here and would rather be here than anywhere else in the world. However, I did embark a plane twice this year: first I visited Croatia because of the wedding occasion that I did not want to miss. It was surprisingly pleasant and not traumatic at all + wonderful to see my friends again. Second journey was to Portugal, which honestly was exhausting - I wanted to do so much in such a short time, instead of recharging the batteries and just resting. So my next vacation must be a quiet place with food, reading and sleeping. Maybe some walks in the nature. But definitely no big, crowded cities because they are tiresome. 

"A Death in the Desert" by Willa Cather (1903)

 

I have yet to find anything by Willa Cather that does not cut me directly in the heart. Her 1918 novel "My Ántonia" is still one of my all-time favourites and to this day I marvel how she created such unforgettable and evocative story in what is basically a very short volume - it was a tiny, slim book that completely overtook me and just thinking about it makes me want to read it again. So it took me a while, but to Cather I eventually did return and it happened via this novella/short story published for the first time in 1903 and later again in her very first published book, which was a short story collection "The Troll Garden" two years later. Considering how much I had enjoyed this, I should probably just get the whole collection - it is even available free online.

"A Death in the Desert" is happening, like other Cather's works, in Great Plains - wide, open spaces, often dusty deserts, in this case somewhere between Nebraska and Wyoming - this is where the main protagonist Everett travels in a train and he is time and time again wrongly recognised as his very similar brother Adriance whom he greatly resembles. We learn that Everett spend his whole life in the shadow of his famous and celebrated composer brother, even to extent that he never married and quietly suffered as his only love, singer Katharine never paid any attention to him and followed his brother on the international tours instead. But now in the middle of nowhere, Katharine and Everett meat again and he learns that she is dying from Tuberculosis here on her brother's farm - she begs him to visit her and during the time spent together, they bond over memories they share, including the connection with Adriance. Everett informs his brother that Katharine is dying and she gets a very gentle and considerate letter that cheers her up enormously, but both of them are aware that the end is near and their love was never to be. Neither Everett nor Katharine never experienced genuine love, being always in the shadow of magnetic and charismatic Adriance. 

I have listened it as an audio book and was moved so much that i almost wept on the street.

Maggie Smith